Donut Even Go There

Can I just start off by saying that today’s workout was a bit brutal?

My back hurts.

My abs hurt.

My thighs hurt.

My arms hurt.

My hair even hurts.

I mean, okay. So maybe hair follicles don’t exactly have pain receptors, but if they did, they’d hurt worst of all.

We’ll talk more about that later though. For now, let me start making up excuses for what took place last night.

Okay, so after I finished yesterday’s post I was perfectly content. I wasn’t hungry at all, so I was just certain that I’d end the night having adhered to my 1,300 calories. Another perfect day. All there was left to do was curl up on the couch, watch the season premiere of the show I’d been wanting to catch up on, and go to bed. Simple, right?

Wrong!

Look, I know it has been a minute since I last watched television, but will someone please tell me why 90% of the commercials are chock FULL of fast food advertisements?

Highly seasoned french fries with steak and gooey cheese.

Ten-story high bacon stuffed hamburgers with gooey cheese.

$5 fairly mediocre at best pizzas baked with various random toppings (including gooey cheese).

Chicken and waffles with… out gooey cheese.

These weren’t even foods I would normally go for, so someone please tell me why my mouth started watering like one of Pavlov’s dogs. By the third commercial break, my stomach had started to grumble quite violently. Of course, I had next to no calories left for the night, so I was like, “Oh. no.”

The more I tried to ignore the nagging sensation of hunger that was beginning to claw away at my stomach, the more worried I became. As much as I’ve tried to be strict about the 1,300 calories, I feared I wouldn’t be able to last the night without at least a small snack.

I did try to fight the urge to go into the kitchen for as long as I possibly could, but by the time the first half of the two-hour premiere was over, I found myself so hungry that I would have been willing to eat anything.

Hmm.

Okay, maybe not anything anything, but anything satisfying and relatively low in calories.

After much standing in the doorway of the fridge and sighing loudly in front of the pantry, I decided upon two sheets of graham crackers. Unfortunately, I didn’t find those to be too filling (lesson learned), so the next choice was a handful of miniature sourdough pretzel bites. Thankfully, those did the trick and weren’t too bad calorie-wise (They had zero fat too!).

I went to bed trying really hard to not beat myself up about going over my limit for the day. The idea of it is still far from thrilling, but at least I tried to ride it out, right?

Night passed. Nightmares. Lots of creepy pretzel-induced nightmares.

I had NO trouble jumping out of bed this morning. In fact, I couldn’t have been happier to wake up if someone had been standing in wait to pay me to do it. And just as planned, it ended up being cardio day.

Today’s Workout: 1 hour. Online full body dance fitness class. Body weight only–no equipment.

You guys, this class is SO much fun (I will definitely share the info in an upcoming post). For me, it’s cardio at its best because it involves two things I love: dancing and really good music.

It’s definitely not a walk in the park (even the thin girls in the class can often be seen slacking when they think no one is looking), but you will finish knowing that you got a good workout–providing that the 1,000,000th squat hasn’t caused you to prematurely expire. 💀👻😂

If I had to rate my own performance today, I’d have to give myself 7.5/10. I didn’t go full out like I sometimes do, but I didn’t coast through it either.

To be honest, today’s instructor wasn’t the owner (she’s crazy intense), which really threw me off. Normally, I catch the night classes when the owner is instructing, the class is packed wall to wall, and the playlists are club-worthy. I mean, the energy is so hype that I’m just like:

Today though? Not so much.

This was my first time doing a morning class and it was so boring in comparison to my beloved night classes. I wasn’t thrilled about the song choices, the class had like, ten people in it, and the instructor was half asleep. Even she couldn’t remember the routines! I definitely think I would have gone harder if I had chosen to watch the recording of last night’s class, but at least I know for next time.

Today’s Consumption: Tacos yet again. 🌮

Haha just kidding. But no… I really did have tacos again because as I see it, if it’s not broken, don’t fix it.

Today’s Real Consumption: 1 mug of hot cocoa (Me in the AM: “Really trying to lay off of coffee”); 3 grilled chicken tacos with pico de gallo; the same epic salad as the last two days; 8 cherries; 1 vanilla iced latte (Me by PM: “Who said anything about giving up coffee? I never said that!” *twitches*)

So yeah, I’m pretty much obsessed with the salad and tacos I’ve been having this week. They are super easy to make, they taste incredible, and they fit perfectly into my daily calorie allowance. At this point, I’m going to simply eat a very similar menu until I get tired of it. No ice cream today though. Yay for that.

I’ll tell you what is NOT “yay” though… donuts.

Today, someone (who is VERY aware of my current weight loss journey) had the audacity to come up to me like, “I’m going to Krispy Kreme to get a dozen donuts, you want in?”

What? Really? That’s what we’re doing now? Really?

A.) What part of you really thinks I have enough calories available in a day to even look in the same direction of a donut, let alone eat one?

And B.) You, sir are as sabotage happy as my raggedy, scheming EX-scale. Be gone!

It’s so funny though because at first I was about to be like:

And then I began plotting revenge like:

“How. Very. Dare. You!” *

*Ten points for Gryffindor if someone knows what I’m referencing here.

But before I knew it, this completely foreign sense of calm came over me and I was like, “No. No thank you. I’m good.”

And they were like, “Oh.”

*Long, super surprised pause*

“Okay then.”

Just like that. Can you believe it?! All I had to say was “No, thank you”. The world didn’t fall to pieces. I didn’t fall down dead. The donuts didn’t “magically jump into my mouth completely of their own volition and without any help or consent on my part”.

Nope. Today I rejected one of the foods I have historically had the hardest time resisting. While this may be a totally insignificant thing to some people, this is just huge for me.

Donuts were originally the first trigger food I adopted when I started bingeing. I wouldn’t go as far to say that I was “hooked” on them per se, but I would always have a hard time turning them down if they were around. Then, if I had one, it would quickly escalate into three, five… it would be awful. Just awful.

So insignificant or not, I am really proud that I was finally able to say, “No more of this nonsense. This simply has to stop.”

I left those donuts in the dust like:

Today was Day 3.

Me to donuts: Bye, Felicia 🙅🏽‍♀️😌

Featured Photo Credit: Jonathan Miksanek via Pexels

GIFs from GIPHY

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s